i wanna feel what's it like being loved (Thursday, April 10, 2008)
sigh. not emo-ing, but just kinda hopeful.
TODAY (:
was just a simple day. but it was a GOOD type of simple day i guess. maybe i AM really into him. as in, ZC. i dunno luhs, maybe its just thinking of him as a good friend. anyways, today was a super ordinary day, with ordinary lessons except the science lab, that proved that i was really into him cause i felt super depressed when i see him ignoring me. unlike that time when i didn't tell anyone that liked him. its out of the point anyway. NOW i know what i should not have done. to tell ANYONE that i liked him. but lik shit liddat, i always say that and always end up like this. zhanhong said he felt happiness when i said i liked him, but thats a whole new different point, the person he liked was marissa and only felt happy cause at least he didn't feel like a reject. but IM the one that feels like a reject. like a apple that was rotten that could only be saved only if it was cut right down to its core; only if SOMEONE sees me as who i REALLY am, and not just my disgusting looks or size or whatever, just, deep down of who i really am, maybe someone would really like me for my personality or character. but i dunno why im writing all this in an online journal in the first place, where EVERYONE can see.
at least i got a new pair of specs. i think that was one of the only things good that happened to me.
YESTERDAY 9/4/08
ordinary ordinary blah blah blah. except that we got this quite cool personala safety alarm. thats about all.
TUESDAY 8/4/08
went to whitesands library again to do my homework. its another ordinary day like no other.
too sian-ed to post anymore luhs. bye for now;
love is hurting me again and again.
♥,
nicOLE :l
TODAY (:
was just a simple day. but it was a GOOD type of simple day i guess. maybe i AM really into him. as in, ZC. i dunno luhs, maybe its just thinking of him as a good friend. anyways, today was a super ordinary day, with ordinary lessons except the science lab, that proved that i was really into him cause i felt super depressed when i see him ignoring me. unlike that time when i didn't tell anyone that liked him. its out of the point anyway. NOW i know what i should not have done. to tell ANYONE that i liked him. but lik shit liddat, i always say that and always end up like this. zhanhong said he felt happiness when i said i liked him, but thats a whole new different point, the person he liked was marissa and only felt happy cause at least he didn't feel like a reject. but IM the one that feels like a reject. like a apple that was rotten that could only be saved only if it was cut right down to its core; only if SOMEONE sees me as who i REALLY am, and not just my disgusting looks or size or whatever, just, deep down of who i really am, maybe someone would really like me for my personality or character. but i dunno why im writing all this in an online journal in the first place, where EVERYONE can see.
at least i got a new pair of specs. i think that was one of the only things good that happened to me.
YESTERDAY 9/4/08
ordinary ordinary blah blah blah. except that we got this quite cool personala safety alarm. thats about all.
TUESDAY 8/4/08
went to whitesands library again to do my homework. its another ordinary day like no other.
too sian-ed to post anymore luhs. bye for now;
love is hurting me again and again.
♥,
nicOLE :l